buonanotte

没有星星的夜晚

只有棉被的温暖

配上热热的美渌

看着浪漫偶像剧

想个不该想的人

偷偷在心里许愿

其实还蛮满足的

every morning every morning

getting up from bed, trying to look my specs.

woah woah, hold it, why isn't it on the desk that i leave on every night. 

"vonne, wake up! get up quick."

"no, go away."

"no come on seriously. wake up."

"ugh! what!?"

"did you see my specs?"

"no. now go away."

ish, then why did i put my specs. 

okok eileen calm down, recall, you were watching pitch perfect final performance. 

no, that was like two nights ago.

yea yea that was two nights ago.

last night..oh! you were reading the book that mom bought.

what else? oh and suddenly mom barged in and told you that you desperately need to do a mask.

and then.....you decided to.

okay so, moving on, you're doing your mask and reading your book.

then  you accidentally fell asleep. yep yep that's it, cause you briefly remember voone coming in and switched off the lights for you.

ok then! if you accidentally fell asleep, that means the specs are under the bed again hehe.

searching searching searching searching.

gosh, i find nothing. how can that be!

ok, we'll run through the story again. gosh.

ok first, you were reading the book that mom bought.

and suddenly mom barged in and told you that you desperately need to do a mask.

and then....you decided to.

so you did.

oh mask mask mask mask mask.

when i did my mask i had to take off my specs right.

yea it's in the bathroom.

look there it is.

sherlock holmes choc to the rescue.





lol.

what if

you pressed the doorbell at 6 on the dot. i screamed from my dresser," someone, get the door!"

you popped your head in before your foot did and threw the brightest smile, one that's even brighter than the ones you have around me, and said," good evening, aunty."

my mom smiled," come in come in." and you said," thanks for having me."

i slipped my arms through the purple long sleeves and stumbled down the stairs.

my mom frowned," and i thought you guys are going out?"

i answered," yea mom why?"

my mom frowned even harder," shouldn't you like dressed better?"

we shared a smile and you said," it's fine aunty."

my mom gave up," alright, have fun. drive safely."

i hugged my mom tight and she whispered in my ear," be careful."

i let out a big laugh and said," hahahhaha, yes mama."


i climbed into the car as you waved back to my mom, and said," so..where do you wanna go?"

i tilted my head and said," no idea."

you started the car," well then i know one place."





when we've reached 'your place', i chuckled," maybe i should have some ideas."

you laughed.

it was a football field.

i climbed out of the car and asked,“ really, what are we doing here, sport boy."

you said nothing and took out pizzas from the car boot.

i snorted," wow, what if i said i want to have cheese cake back in the car just now?"

you smiled," you said no idea on nine out of ten nights."

i rolled my eyes," ISH."

"and you hate cheese cake."



we sat on the grass and i looked up into the horizon.

you laid out the pizza and handed me a slice. it was my favorite. macaroni and cheese.

we're both in baggy jeans.

im in my purple sweater and you're wearing a plain white shirt.

im wearing sneakers and you're wearing vans.

i didn't do any makeup and you didn't bother to set your hair.




mouthful i said," hey i think something is missing."

you shook your head and said," yea sure." then you pulled out your phone.

something came out. it was one direction's Little Things.

i smile. how did you know that.

i watched as you let the pizza crumbs fall on your shirt.

i could just do this whole summer. watching you and say absolutely nothing.

that would be a hell of a summer.

i didn't know how long have i been staring at you until you turned to me and said

"you're missing the sunset."





we waited for the stars to come out. because this was your favorite part of the whole night.

you ask me to make a wish every time we do this, even if there's no meteor whole night.

i opened my eyes and i saw you still staring at the starry sky.

"why didn't you make a wish." i asked.

"because i don't need it." you said.

"and why did you think i need it?" i was confused.

you laughed and said," oh you need it."

"why?"

"because you wish to marry ryanhiga or see one direction every time. that's nearly impossible."

"ISH. and how did you know that."

"because you whispered too loud the last time."





and it was all silent.

if it was with others, i might be thinking this is extremely awkward and uneasy.

if it was with others, i might be thinking about something to talk about right now.

if it was with others, i might be thinking if they're having second thoughts.



but i'd never. if it was you.

just as the anna kendrick started singing when i'm gone, you stood up and let out your hand

"we should be going."

we gathered the garbage and headed for the car.

i saw you taking one last look at the field and the starry night.




just as we're reaching my gate, you asked," so when do you wanna go out again?"

i said," we should really do something, like movies the next time."

you smiled," yes, but it would never be the same."

i smiled because i knew you're right.



you stopped the car in front of my house.

i handed back your cardigan and said," thank you for tonight..and pizza."

you smiled "goodnight."

既然相爱

我问她：他爱你吗？

她说：爱。

我问她：你爱他吗？

她说：爱。

我问她：所以问题在哪里？

可能是身边故事看过了，自己的故事经历够了，

就觉得在一个适合的时段遇到自己爱的人，

而那个人又刚刚好爱自己，

是一件非常非常难得又有缘分的事情。

在《小资女孩向前冲》里，

秦子奇为了沈杏仁放弃了继承爸爸的事业。

沈杏仁疯了问：为什么？你是那么的努力。

秦子奇说：因为事业这些东西，我可以自己努力，

但是爱情除了努力，还需要一点运气。

所以我总觉得爱情这种东西很炫，

小时候都不觉得，

可能小时候还年轻哈哈，比较有魅力，

自己喜欢的人都会刚刚好喜欢自己，

所以总觉得爱情没什么难的嘛。

可是现在长大了哦，至少18岁了，

真的觉的呵呵其实没有那么容易。

世界上有70亿人口，你遇到了他是缘分没错。

可是不要忘记，他的世界也有70亿人口，

他遇到了你是他的缘分吗？

也是70亿分之一的机会。

天啊，后面有几个零啊。

小时候根本就不懂这种东西，

联络了几封信息就以为是爱情，

他对你甜甜的笑就以为是爱情，

心里有暖暖的哇就以为是爱情。

现在想起来真的觉得是神经病哈哈。

现在长大了，大家也成长了。

对待爱情没有那么勇敢，可能大家都怕受伤。

那神经病的青春，跌跌撞撞的让我们受伤了不少，

可是也成长了不少。

都说小孩子要疼了才会怕，

小时候贪玩想去玩刀还是碰热水，

妈妈从来没有阻止，

别人的妈妈可能会怜惜的说：哦baby别碰，乖哦很热哦

可是我妈妈会说：不要拦她，给她碰，痛了才会怕

呵呵，我就是有个这样的妈妈

大家都怕受伤，所以那壶热水没人碰，渐渐的也冷了。

我有个好朋友猫拉屎，

她这个人没什么很特殊的优点哈哈没有拉，

可是她全身上下，从头顶顶到脚趾头，

让我最最最最羡慕的

就是她对爱情的真诚和勇气。

即使在爱情上受到了多大的挫折，

前男朋友如何的背叛，

心脏如何的悲痛欲绝，

身边的人如何的辱凌，

她从来没有放弃过爱情。

更从来没有特地的去说前男朋友/小三的坏话。

更多都是我在旁边看不过眼，拼了命的说哈哈。

可是她没有。

对于这点，我真的是神马的羡慕啊哈哈

可能别人会说她这么快的就能从情伤走出来，

真的是个很花心的人。

听到了这种话，我当下立马超想好好去踹那个人的脚，

然后说，你懂屁屁啊！

每个人都有自己走出心碎的方式，
每个人都有自己走出难过的方式，
她被自己世界里最重要的两个人背叛了依然坚强的站起来，
总好过你大半夜了还在那自己写status，期盼着一个不可能。

好吧，有时候我真的很坏。


可是她对爱情的真诚，真的没办法不佩服。
曾经有个人对我说：你可以对我发脾气，可是请你记得，
伤害你的是别人，不是现在这个真心想对你好的人。

虽然在当时并不应景，可是现在回想其实他说的一点都没错，
错的上一个人，不是爱情，
我们却依然眷念上一个人，
放弃了爱情。
这世界真是不公平。




所以说，过去的错误就让它过去吧。

曾经受过伤的心，补了补，继续给他爱下去 :p

人生那么短，青春那么短，别后悔阿


所以说，我亲爱爱的好朋友，不是你猫拉屎哈哈，
另外一个，对就是你。


不要放弃 :)

好好祈祷

既然相爱






xoxo.

insanely awesome

bestie's officially 18! haha.

here's jack saying happy birthday. sorry i can't find finn hahaha. 

anyway we made a little trip to Anson, one of her essential in life, for a birthday dinner haha. three of her life-long friends went too--simon, jonathan and jackson.

the dinner's nothing special actually.

just that we met besite's perennial crush. we called him 13 behind his back because he was 13 years old the time she first liked him. but i think he was 16 something now. jackson or jonathan spotted him entering the rest room. so i decided to stalk a little because erm, sadly i've never actually laid eyes on this legendary boy though bestie talked about him for so many years. so i followed him with bestie and pretended to wash our hands until he came out from the men's washroom. there's only one basin for washing hands so he had to wait for us. i peeked into the mirror and saw him standing behind. hahahahahahaha what groupie!

this actually reminded me of my first 'chance meeting' with eric. though it's not really by chance. yea i planned it. i saw him walking into the men's washroom as well -___-  and yea you guys know the rest. so we'll skip that part. cause it quite shameless. lolol.

the three boys all had mixed grilled i think, i had beef and i think bestie's was..chicken? can't exactly remember but they ordered wine! no not actually wine, it's beer or something. bestie ordered a chocolate smoothie for me and she had beer -__- cause she said im still 17 lol. not officially 18 so cannot drink beer, only smoothie. lolol. and i told her to put the two cups together and take a picture to upload on facebook. the caption will be 17versus18. ahahahahahahaa. oh it's not funny? well i thought it was._.

note jackson enjoying his mixed grilled. and the two cups in the middle of the photo. the two bffs smoothie and beer. lolol.

but i did take one sip from bestie's cup. let's hope my mom won't be reading this. but it tasted horrible! like seriously it's burning my throat and even if im drinking my smoothie for the rest of the night, i still can taste beer.

oh! and a little story. two strangers/ladies came up to our table in the middle of our meal and sang songs for us. and we were like awkwardly looking at each other until one of the ladies handed us a card. they're actually gathering donations for starving children. so i asked them if they can sing happy birthday. and they were like oh sure! who's the birthday kid. i pointed bestie and bestie was like sosososo shy hahhaha. so they sang happy birthday and we stuffed a few notes into the card to help the children.

i know that some of you would argue that the two ladies might be liars or something but i tried my best not to think that way. there're still some good citizens in this world alright. and the ladies' voices were pretty amazing actually :D

oh and the spotlight of the night--the cake!! oh and they actually ordered a chocolate cake that has a bit of wine element in it-_- and it was too bitter for me so i gave my share to jackson but i did enjoyed the cream and the chocolate part and the chocolate pieces on top of it <3 yea im such a chocolate freak lol.

and that's her! hahaha, making her 3 big wishes. and we made her say the last wish and i think it was wishing everyone a good result at the end of year or stay happy or something. ^_____^

i think she looks super cute here haha. 

the lightning in the restaurant made it like sunshine on us, haha, we're so pretty even the lights couldn't help to shine on us. lolol. 

after dinner, we went to a park near my house for a little stroll. and i accidentally stepped into the deep drain and ruined my new shoes and got a little scratches but it's all good. bestie was like so casual haha i think she's already used to me falling down or tripping over like a daily routine :p we walked around the park or maybe just across the bridge lolol and chit-chatted. it was nice :)

and we took some photos ;) and jackson kept on saying that the one who stood at the last of the line will meet a ghost or something. ish! double ish! triple ish! and the ish after that! 

and that's us ::) teehee! 

HAPPY 18th BIRTHDAY BABY GIRL :)

hope you'll like your gift. 

CONTINUE

to be this randomly awesome

to be this purely beautiful

to find your prince charming

i luavve you! 

muaxx muaxx.

lol.

xoxo :)

nothing's the same anymore

never do i understand.

how can a person love two at the same time.

not even after jacob told bella that he has seen it.

with sam and emily and leah. 

and never do i understand 

why i am so innocently foolish

not even after you left me behind before

i guess that's just our story.

maybe.

im your jacob

im the one with all the laughs and funs

the one you wanted around all the time

the one who's one of your favorites

the one who's warm

we can't explain it. it just can't be explained.

im your jacob

but she's the one.

the edward

the one with the reason for you to wake up

the one who's with you every night till you sleep

the one whom you look forward to see in school

the one who's the one

the one which's even harder to explain.

but come to think of it. sam never did explain anything to leah.

but emily is the one.

leah's heartbroken.

but sam's nowhere better.

standing in other's position to rethink the situation

is my one and only speciality.

but never did i know that it'd become my weakness as well.

never been able to hate you

is the only thing that i've been angry with myself.

i wanted to make you suffer

i wanted to make you go crazy

i wanted you to be as heartbroken as i was

but i can't.

cause you're just being honest.

and that's one of the things that i love most about you.

sam did nothing wrong. 

needless to say you.

bella did nothing wrong either.

she asked jacob never to ask. 

because it'll always be him.

jacob never asks. he just sticks around bella. 

and was there every time she needs him.

leah never asks. cause she knows sam better than anyone.

and she knows nothing's the same anymore.

i guess. i can never be jacob. 

hehe.

i don't have the generosity.

im leah.

i want him to have what's best for him.

i just don't want to stick around to watch.

--Leah Clearwater. 

Breaking Dawn chapter 16 p.316

so..i take it you never actually read that book.

dear sam,

im your leah, im not leaving don't worry

 i'll always be in your pack.

but sweetheart, nothing's the same anymore.